I agree with many of the things you have said.
To answer the question posed at the end,well, I think that is why we are all here:) To get a relatable shoulder- those who know the pain- and feedback?
Some will say “say nothing,let God handle it”.But I am not sure that is right for these reasons.
Yes,He will handle it,and we should let Him handle it.But,isnt the whole thing abt being Christians in this world is that we are His hands and feet and His vocal voice in this world? So there is a need for some vocalism,speak up for righteousness?
Think also,should the bottom falls out,how does that make us,Christians look, having known and seemingly turned a blind eye? The very thing we say we want to avoid- a scandal- happens. Only now the fingerpointing is worse.The public revelation hurts the name of Christianity and Jesus- giving ammunition to an enemy who waits for such. Its not just ” a bad apple” but ” all are bad apples”.Christianity and the name of Jesus is mocked,saying we are all the same.
Now that brings me to the scripture you mentioned:” Be wise as serpents and harmless as doves”.
How can people and others be wise if they do not know? How,per se,can you avoid danger if you dont know where it is?
So I believe it is okay to speak out. BUT,in a proper order.
1st- dont rush to tell. Talk to God.Wait,get on your knees,and tell God what happened.
2: Tell someone. And this is for various reasons. Your mental well being.Its hard to keep things bottled up. Exposure- someone else can help you pray for that person.Accountability- someone else can help you pray for yourself.
And this ties into #1. The Lord will guide you who to talk to. You want to talk to the right people.For having that knowledge,how do they then handle it?
Which leads to #3. Being harmless. We dont want to become or going down to a level thats later regretted.
And after we have done tell one or two-certain folks-try not to dwell on it too much? To let it regurgitate to create an ulcer( fester) within us.Destroy our hearts and peace of mind. We want our healing.
To let God have the vengeance. (Well really His mercy be at work.Which is the part we really dont want- let that hammer come down)☹
But,alas,He is not like us.His name is mercy.
I didnt exactly bring scripture verses but this I believe is what the Bible and Jesus would want from us. That we may go on in peace and maintain our righteousness. We do our part,and leave the rest- wait patiently😫😬- on Him? ( you note the faces.Can I add,maintain a sense of humor? Some healthy joy.” The joy of the Lord is our strength”).