- September 16, 2022 at 11:30 am #4320WisdomParticipant
This is intended for those still attending, serving, and working at the Brooklyn Tabernacle. To those who either grew up in the church or came from outside and have been serving in some capacity. It is an attempt to validate the feelings that have made you feel uncomfortable, but you brush it off with the broad stroke of assumption “well, that’s just the way it is,” or “I’m sure that’s how all churches are.” For the one who was not okay with the way someone in leadership treated you, and you persistently plodded on, because your desire to serve meant you needed to “die to self” in order for the work of the Lord to continue. To those who have been dying inside over the course of months and years because of how you’ve been treated and what you’ve heard from leaders, this is for you.
God created your emotions. They are not evil. When something doesn’t feel right, that’s your spirit’s way of communicating that you need to stop and take a closer look. It might be that you are mistaken – that years of past trauma have misinformed your judgement. But it does you a disservice to brush off how you feel. Trying to mentally rationalize an emotional feeling causes the most grievous of conflicts within the body, mind, and spirit.
If something doesn’t FEEL right, it’s because something IS not right. I urge you to step outside the circle of people who all agree with each other. Speak to a licensed therapist. Is the behavior you’re experiencing truly healthy for you and those around?
A book I found incredible helpful to understanding and dissecting the hidden behaviors of manipulation and abuse I have experienced throughout my entire life, but specifically in churches, is Something’s Not Right: Decoding the Hidden Tactics of Abuse-and Freeing Yourself from Its Power. As I read through its chapters, each point was a veritable wrecking ball of hard truths, like someone yanking off a lifelong blindfold and finding myself overwhelmingly blinded by the light of truth.
For those who have no curiosity, no nagging feelings – this message isn’t for you. You can forget you even read this. All the rest – I hope you can understand that your feelings ARE real, and CAN be trusted.
- September 18, 2022 at 6:10 am #4323BT VolunteerParticipant
@Wisdom. I’m sorry that you also have been manipulated and abused at BT and other churches. It should never have happened. Thank you very much for sharing your wisdom and for the book recommendation. I keep hearing about that book! I am going to order it today because I want to better understand. The 2nd part of the title is so telling… Hidden Tactics of Abuse. That is precisely what it is.
This has got to stop. But it only will when our brothers and sisters say NO MORE.
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